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Why Are You Afraid of Public Speaking?

Most people don't know "why" they are afraid of public speaking. They just know that they ARE afraid. Recent studies rank the fear of public speaking, a.k.a. stage fright or Glossophobia, in the top 5 of all fears. That's pretty high considering its companions on that list are fear of spiders, fear of heights, and even the fear of death. Think about that for a minute, there are people who would rather die than to speak publicly. Sounds crazy, right? The sad truth is it's not that crazy.

You may be wondering "why AM I afraid to speak publicly?" For most people the underlying reason is a fear of failure, rejection, and humiliation. The mentality of someone with this fear is that "I am afraid to make mistakes and then be humiliated in front of the audience". While this is a legitimate fear, the reality is that you aren't the only one to feel this and it's OK to feel this way. The truth is, your audience does NOT want you to fail. They want you to succeed. And even if you do make a mistake, they will be understanding. The crowd will not mock your mistakes.

I want to share a story with you about me. I was a very shy, introverted child. I didn't talk to people I didn't know well, and I couldn't get up on stage to do any kind of performance. I learned to play the trombone when I was about 9. I was volunteered to perform in a school play. It wasn't my idea and I didn't see any way around it. I practiced for a week straight and thought I was ready. On the day of the performance, I was so nervous I felt physically sick. I didn't want to do performance. I wanted to die. So, I took a small hammer and dented the slide of the trombone enough so that it wouldn't slide (I guess I really wanted to play drums!). I showed up to school with my "altered" instrument and proceeded to tell an elaborate story about how my trombone was damaged. Luckily there were no spares and I was allowed to skip my performance.

I want to share one other story to show you where I ended up after conquering my stage fright. By the time I got to college, I had a few tools under my belt for dealing with my fear. In my sophomore year, I became an orientation guide, giving tours of the campus to incoming freshmen and parents. For two weeks each summer I had to speak in front of groups as small as 5-6 and as large as 200 - 300. I would talk for hours, giving facts and figures, answering questions, and even entertaining the group. I later joined a dance troop that regularly performed in front of hundreds of people. Again, I used the tools I had and even developed my own tools for dealing with the stage fright. Not bad considering what I did to that poor trombone!

I tell these stories because they illustrates the lengths some people will go to in order to avoid public speaking or any kind of presentation or performance, and also to illustrate that with time and effort, you can accomplish great things by overcoming your fear.

There is good news for those of you who do suffer from this kind of panic. You can minimize the stress, anxiety, panic, and fear and even USE THIS FEAR AS A TOOL TO MAKE YOU A BETTER SPEAKER. For most people the fear can be overcome with just some simple steps, without the need for therapy. The key is to know how to prepare yourself for the event and how to keep yourself focused. And like everything else in life, the more you do, the better you are - that is "practice makes perfect".

So, the next time you have to give a speech, presentation, or performance in front of a group, remember this: your fear is a tool that can help you be a better speaker. Your audience WANTS you to succeed. You just need to get up and do it.


为什么你要害怕演讲?

大多数人不知道为什么他们会害怕演讲。他们只知道他们害怕。近期的研究把对演讲的害怕,又称为怯场言语恐怖,排到了对所有事物恐惧的前5位。在这个列表中它和对蜘蛛的恐惧,恐高甚至对死亡的恐惧排到了一起,这样很值得深思。想想看,有些人宁愿死也不愿意演讲。听起来很疯狂对不对?事实上完全不是那么一回事。

你也许会问“为什么我害怕在公共场合说话呢?”大多数人心中的答案是害怕失败、拒绝和丢脸。有这种恐惧的人的想法是“我害怕出错并在听众面前丢脸”。这没有什么不对的,而且实际上也不是你有这样的想法。事实是,你的听众不希望你失败。他们希望你能成功。即使你真的出错了,他们也能够理解。大家不会嘲笑你的错误。

我来给你们讲讲我的一个故事吧。我以前很害羞很内向,不和不相熟的人说话,更不能到台上做任何表演。我在九岁时学的是演奏伸缩喇叭。我被拉到一个校园音乐会上志愿出演。这不是我的想法也没有办法逃避。我练了整整一个星期想想也应该准备好了。到了表演那天,我很紧张也觉得身体不舒服。我不想表演。我当时还有点想死。所以,我拿了个小锤子敲我伸缩喇叭的伸缩端把它敲陷下去了这样就伸缩不起来了(我想我那时应该是想去打鼓吧~)。然后我带着改造过的乐器上台然后准备告诉大家我的伸缩喇叭是如何弄坏的。幸运的是当时没有备用品所以我的演出取消了。

另外一个故事在我战胜怯场后。到我上大学的时候,我为自己准备了些工具来应付我的怯场。大二的时候,我成为一个校园导游。带领新生和家长参观校园。每年夏天我会为从五六人到二三百人的团体演讲。我能说上几个小时,给出数据和图表,答疑甚至说笑话活跃气氛。同样我也运用了这个工具甚至自己也想到了新的工具来对付怯场。看来那次把伸缩喇叭砸坏也不是什么坏事。

我告诉大家这些故事是因为他们说明了人们想要避免演讲或其他公众演出的话需要花费很多的功夫,同样也告诉我们花点时间来战胜恐惧你能得到更大的成就。

这里有一条对于为了怯场而头疼的人的好消息。你完全能够使压力,紧张,焦虑和恐惧最小化甚至把恐惧当成一种工具来使用。对大多数人来说只需要简单几步就能够战胜恐惧。关键是要知道怎样让自己准备好和如何让自己注意力集中。就像生活中的其他事情一样,你做得越多就做得越好,或者说“熟能生巧”。

所以,下次你要演讲或演出的时候,记住这一条:你的恐惧能帮你成为更好的演说者。你的听众希望你能成功。你要做的只是站起来,然后开始。


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